It’s that time of year again – the end of one, the beginning of another. The end of a decade, even.
At the same time, it’s just Wednesday.
But it’s only “just Wednesday,” if we treat it that way.
In the past, I have looked at New Year’s in this way – that it’s just an arbitrary day, no different than any other. I have looked at it, and the notion of New Year’s resolutions with some level of disdain.
I realize now that this misses a great opportunity to reflect on our lives right now.
I’ve been trying to figure out where this feeling comes from – that New Year’s is just some arbitrary distinction with no inherent value – and I think it’s from the notion that you can actually reflect back on your life, you can institute changes in your habits and actions at any time. You don’t have to wait until January 1.
Recently I was listening to an episode of The Liturgists podcast when Pete Holmes was the guest. He said something that really resonated with me:
“You are under no obligation to be the person you were 15 seconds ago”
Everybody knows the joke (well, observation) that on January 1, the gyms will be packed, but by March 1, they’ll be back to “normal.” It’s easy to then look at New Year’s and say, “See? Completely arbitrary.”
But taking time to reflect on where you have been, where you are, and where you are going is a good thing. Ideally, it is a practice that is more frequent than once a year, but once a year is better than nothing.
I wanted to share a couple of practices that I try to do regularly to reflect on where things are in my life.
First, just under two years ago, I began a daily-ish practice of journaling. I have found immense value in this. I do a modified version of the Bullet Journal. I have a couple of pages I use as a 6-month overview where I put major events that are upcoming for quick reference. Each month, I also create a page as a calendar with a to-do list of major things I hope to accomplish that month. A couple of months ago, I also began a “Habit Tracker” page where I have 10 boxes for each day, with 10 habits I am working on for the given month (more on the habit tracker in a bit).
Aside from those pages, I jot down thoughts, events, and tasks to do throughout the day. I start each day on a new page (sometimes they go a couple of lines, sometimes they go multiple pages). Each day I start with 3 bullet points of things for which I am thankful. I want to start each day by putting myself in a proper mindset – one of gratitude. Some days I am simply grateful for coffee or a quiet day at the office. Other days, it is deeper, like my daughters curling up with me on the couch watching a movie, or just their laughs.
After that I just write whatever is on my mind. Maybe there is something big going on in my life, and I want to be able to look back and see what I was thinking in the moment. I can look back and see how my own thoughts developed over time. I can see when things happened, how events played out.
The journal has a finite number of pages. It provides a natural point for reflection as I come to the end of one and begin another. I finished one a couple of weeks ago, and I had 240 pages, roughly 8-9 months over which I could look back and see all that had happened. We had trips, weddings, funerals. Devin finished preschool and started Kindergarten. So much happened.
But on the flip side, I can also see the unfinished projects (and let’s be honest – the unstarted projects), undeveloped ideas. There is value in reflecting on these as well.
In reflecting on life, there is definitely value in stepping back to see the bigger picture – whether that is a 9-month journal or the beginning of a new year.
Ideally, for me, I am also taking time every day to reflect, and if I’m doing it right – recalibrate.
A second thing I have been doing, as mentioned before, is a habit tracker. Each month I set up a new page, with a line for each day. On each line I have 10 boxes of various habits or systems I am working to implement in my life. For example, this month I have:
Read Bible
Code
Write
Journal
Lecture/Sermon/Audiobook/Podcast (basically some kind of learning)
75 pushups
Cook a meal at home
Shop time (work in my garage workshop)
Clean/fix something
Meditate
Each day I do one of those, I fill in the box accordingly.
This practice really provides a visualization on a daily level of how I am doing with some specific things I am working on. If I have a bunch of blank boxes, that sends a strong visual message and I am forced to reflect on how I am prioritizing my time or the systems I am working to instill
There are many levels on which we can reflect on our lives. Was today or yesterday what I wanted it to be? What can I do differently today or tomorrow? Did this month live up to my hopes and expectations? If I look at my habit tracker, maybe I can get an indication of why it did or didn’t. Did the last year/decade take me where I wanted to go? Again, what can I continue? What can I do differently?
New Year’s may seem like an arbitrary thing – just another Wednesday – but it is only arbitrary if we treat it that way. Treat it as having value in reflecting on the past year – what was good, what was lacking, where do you want to improve. Use the New Year as a perfect time to begin the habit of reflecting on your life, and it will have value. If you are reading this at some point in the future, nowhere near January 1st, the message still applies.
You don’t need to wait until January 1 to make changes and improvements to your life. Like the Pete Holmes quote above - there is nothing obligating you to be the same person you were when you started reading this post
Happy New Year!